Contract Sex in Marriage: Yes or No?

J.Ennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have inserted a clause in the pre-marital agreement that stipulates a minimum of 4 sexual encounters per week. But experts reject the idea. Here’s the reason

At least four times a week: The Lopez-Affleck family needs to have a lot of intimacy. The agreement says so. Just as a house exists for rent or car rental, so too in a future (second) marriage there will be a “minimum” amount of sex between the two stars.

Sex as a gym workout?

If it is true that the flame of emotion must be constantly fed, the purpose of the VIP couple style seems to be to precisely prevent the emotion from escaping. But there is also the risk of completely “killing” each other’s will (and vice versa), reducing the relationship to a mere performance, such as a training session or an unmarked appointment.. Marco Ingleri, Psychotherapist, Sexologist and Vice President of the Italian Society of Sexology and Sexual Education (Sies) confirms this.

Sexuality in contract (or through contract) Does emotion help?

JLO and Ben Affleck need to plan sex 4 times a week, somewhat like a gym workout for boyfriends and fans Fitness Or as the presence of certain foods in a diet. The news spread on the web without any confusion from the experts. Can establishing a certain number of intimate relationships really help couples keep their emotions alive? “No, I think it’s impossible, because Eros needs an atmosphere, of course not a deal. Withdrawing it in the form of a written agreement does not seem reasonable or possible to me, as it implies a commitment to something that cannot be guaranteed. There is no guarantee of love»English explains. “Then there’s another aspect: Performance is not the key to ensuring close relationships,” the expert added.

Sex is not a performance

The idea of ​​being able to establish in black and white how much space and frequency sex should be given falls into an argument, as in today’s society, which measures everything, even things that cannot be “quantified”. And Eros is not measurable, it is a normal physical Not performance »sexologists and psychotherapists explain. But should there be a minimum number of relationships between a man and a woman who are married?” No, By no means do I want to convey that I recommend for the mother to be inactive. Men, for example, produce less testosterone, so the biological aspects are not the same over time, they change with age. Added to this is a change in the couple’s balance, explained the psychotherapist and vice president of Cessus.

The difference between falling in love and falling in love: Gender cannot be measured

It is known that the frequency of intimate relationships is as high as you are younger or at the beginning of the relationship, but in reality the fact that they “diminish” is not necessarily equal to low desire or “second-rate” feeling because, according to experts, the nature of the relationship has evolved. In addition, each couple is unique: “Just as love cannot be measured, so happiness cannot be measured Tout CourtEveryone makes it based on their own sensitivities and criteria: it’s something very personal»English explains. “In general It is true that we begin with a stage of falling in love, where Eros predominates, but then the feeling takes on other forms as well, many of which. Suffice it to say that the ancient Greeks had 8 terms to indicate subtlety. Even though we call it just love, they had it too Agape Or Philia, To give just a few examples, which indicate selfless love and intimacy, respectively. In short, the emotional elements also change according to the alchemical reaction and, eros, after the most emotional love, usually have an evolutionary stage. Then there are the personal elements, because each couple pays their own way to stay together, the expert explains.

Tell me how happy a couple is

In short, the misconception that there is a certain indicator of happiness, such as the number of intimate relationships per week, will be doubled: believing that sex is the only indicator of a couple’s happiness and that it is merely a physical performance. But then how do you know if a couple is “happy” or “pregnant”? “The I believe that of course the indicator is not the amount of eros, but the quality of the emotional bond. Over time it, like wine, either turns into vinegar or the quality improves. But pay attention, what is meant by love and marital relationship: Often a person is out of need to feel love for each other rather than love: making love is a free gesture, but more tiring because it refers to an active attitude, when love is felt passive, it does not require effort.. If you do not realize the difference, you can misunderstand and get into trouble. “

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